Radical Change

As we grow up, we define ourselves. We find who we really are, and what our values are. We discover what we truly care about, and what we want to do with our lives. We think about who we want to keep us company along for the ride. Many of us become people we never thought we could be, making complete metamorphoses. Everyone goes through their own struggles in their unique coming of age, but there's something about the whole process that everyone can relate too. This is what makes coming of age literature and films so timeless. 

People change so much in the span of a small amount of time, in relation to the grand scheme of their lives. For most people, in just a few short years, they've decided the general direction that their life is going to be headed. However, in some cases, they have no control of where they're headed.

They just have to ride the current and try not to drown in all the unsuspecting twists and turns.

They have no say in the cards they're given, they just have to make the limited choices they do have and try not to mess their life up. 

These stories are usually the most interesting ones to read. The Good Thief by Hannah Tinti is a good example of this. It's about a 12 year old orphan named Ren, who was dumped as a baby at a convent named Saint Anthony's in New England. It's clear that the story takes place pre-twentieth century, based on things like how they get from place to place, (by horse and buggy), and the types of technology mentioned. 

Ren's just like most kids...except for the fact that he's missing an arm. He never really found out how he lost it. All he knew was that's it had been that way since he came to Saint Anthony's, as only a baby. Missing an arm clearly presents a bit of a problem for him, as it would for anyone. It takes him longer to do work around the orphanage than it does for other kids. However, his disability has made him quite determined and dedicated to being as useful as the other kids. Ren also loves to imagine things, and is very creative. When one of the boys got adopted by a farmer, he imagined every detail about what his life would be like. He imagined what the farmer's wife would make for dinner, and how she would tuck him into bed at night. He has imagined these little scenarios multiple times in the book so far. He's very creative in this way, and he probably does this to replace the love he never got. To fulfill the empty void where memories like that should be. 

Another important hing about Ren is that he likes to steal things. Not anything so big that anyone would ever get mad, but just small things. Little knick-knacks he finds to be interesting. This comes in especially handy when a couple of scam artists take him in. 

A man named Benjamin Nab appears at the orphanage and tells an elaborate story about how he was Ren's long lost brother and how he's been looking for him ever since. Ren is elated at the prospect that he has real family now, and Benjamin gets to keep Ren. As Ren is saying his last goodbyes to the place he'd known his whole life, the author says, "All he'd ever wanted was to leave, but now as he was about to, he felt uneasy." I read this sentence and I'd felt like I'd been hit with a ton a bricks. It's so true, in coming of age, and even in life in general. As we grow up, we lose who we were and develop into the people we become.  

There's always a part of us that wants nothing more than to go back to the days when we lived simply, only caring about what was immediately next and not about the long run, and all the stresses and worries that come with age. 

It really shows how we lack to appreciate things until we know they'll be taken away from us. How when we grow up, we're never totally sure what we want or don't want. It shows how one can be so excited for the future, yet dread it at the same time. This is a bitter sweet moment in the book for Ren, as he's leaving the only people he's ever known, his only friends, to embark on a journey with a man he just met. 

The sign of a good book is if it makes you feel like you were right there with the character, think about what you would do if you were in that situation, and makes you think about your own life, which is exactly what this book has made me do. And I'm not even finished with it yet!

At the moment when Benjamin told Ren he wasn't his real brother, Ren's heart dropped. The hope that there was something good in life was shattered. Benjamin told him something that has stuck with me. he said, 

          "'Is that what you wanted to hear?'

          'No.'

          The man reached over, took hold of the lantern, and blew it our. Night enveloped the barn. 'Well,' he said at last to the darkness between them, 'that's when you know it's the truth.'"

That made a little part of me shrivel up and die inside. It's just so true! It speaks into the whole coming of age experience. It shows how utterly confusing growing up can be. What you think to be the truth always changes, and what you think should be the truth rarely is. It sums up the, "false-view-to-correct-view" journey that many characters (and people) take as they grow up. What one thinks to be reality when they're twelve changes drastically when they're 42. Some people reading that probably took it as pessimism, but Benjamin is just being realistic. Often times the truth is too hard for us to face so we contort reality to what fits our idea of what it should be. At some point, everyone realizes that they must accept what is, and not what they think it should be.

Ren's experiencing rapid change. He's being exposed to things that make him wise beyond his years. He's growing up in a dangerous environment that he didn't choose, and he's trying his best to grow up right. The environment Ren is growing up in is out of control, yet it's shaping who he is. The people he's growing up around are teaching him a way of life that he may never grow out of. His struggles are universal in that everyone has felt like they shouldn't be where they are, and that they are out of place. Everyone has been in situations out of their control and had to react accordingly.

My hope for Ren is that he learns from the unique way he's growing up and makes the best of it, like we all should.